The Maya Moodswings

Well....
Long time no anything, huh? Heh heh... ^^"
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OKAY, OKAY..... I'M SORRY.
I KNOW I KEEP vowing to post more often and whatnot, but it's not like I'm wasting away in free time here. Architecture is one tough course, i'll tell you that -.-.
At the moment, I'm all Zombie-ish cos I just pulled an all-nighter and then slept for two full night straight without doing ANY work -.-.
Hear that? THAT's called IMBALANCE.
I'm such an ass -.- *facepalm*
I'm actually REALLY frustrated with myself and this lethargy I can't seem to overcome :/. Archi is not a course I can afford to slack off in,ESPECIALLY since this is my final term for the year.
God.
Only 3 more months and my first year in college will be over o.O. Has it really been that long? :/
The last few months are a blur. And it's really depressing cos I can't remember all these things that WANT to remember... The CRAZY-ASS things my friends and I do, the things we've talked about, the places we've gone, my 18th birthday celebrations with my friends, and my first one without my family :/. And like I said, I haven't been posting here, or writing in my journal, which i vowed I'd do :/. 'Cos there's just been no time at all.
It's a little scary too. My life:I feel like I'm supposed to be watching an hourglass but there are things that are just keeping me so busy that I can't seem to find time to keep my eye on it. And when I finally turn back to it, the final grains of sand are pouring into the bottom.
I feel lost...

Anyway, a LOT has changed since I last posted. Some of my friends and I are less friends that we were before and some of us have grown closer. New relationships have formed, and some old steady ones have frayed.
And what's frustrating is, I can't Do anything about it. I can't run around FORCING people to tell me what's going on in their lives, and why they're changing, right?
I want things to go back to the way they were before. Without the dark emotions and the cold war. Where everything about these people were all sunshine and daisies, if you get me...
And then there's me. I guess I've changed too. There are times when I just want to be left alone. I never did before, but I've started snapping at my friends, reacting to excessive noise, and being just plain 1mean for no reason. I feel my tolerance level has reduced :/.
Plus I've turned 18...so I don't really don't now what that means now. More freedom? More responsibility? I don't really FEEL any different.... o.O :/
Things are just changing. And I don't want them to.
This is a depressing post, I know. But I needed to get all this off my shoulders. Maybe I'll have some happy stuff to post next time.
Till then, Peace!
xoxo
Maya
Song on my mind: Everywhere- Michelle Branch (I can sorta play it on the guitar ^_^)